cat's game.

right now i am writing to put things off.

i am currently mid-way through digesting the chuck klosterman novel killing yourself to live: 85% of a true story. i have found it widely entertaining and slightly enlightening. it has stirred emotions in me that have been dormant for quite some time. the itch for the unexplored, the dreams of the open road. next summer will hopefully hold the keys to the horizons i have been waiting to explore for years. however, currently, i am finding it impossible to sit down and read. all afternoon i have hurriedly launched task after task in hopes of getting them completed so i may once again sit down and get lost inside the pages. it hasn't happened.

issue two of the times is in dire straights. not especially, i mean, it is going to be abbreviated compared to the first, and especially compared to the third. the transition from first issue to third is making the second suffer. as the format is being reworked, it has drained all the creativity from me for the second issue. i have yet to write my column, and i have no ideas to project right now. i just keep waiting for something to hit me, and with printing only two weeks away, i need to roll up my sleeves and get to work.

dharma bum summer is coming along. as a novel, i have no idea how realistic it is as a concept, but the words continue to pour whenever i do take the time to sit down and work on it. i have the plot mapping done, a firm outline, and a synopsis of each chapter guiding me, but i have taken a more free flowing approach through the first couple of chapters. that is where it lies currently, a storyboard and two chapters. twenty three left to be penned, or, i suppose typed in this case. i have been managing to sit down and work for at least a period of time each of the days this week, which has been reassuring. however, today, i have no drive to press forward through the next few pages. writing novels is tough. that must be why people don't often try. each word has to be made real, and the entire context of everything gets too overbearing at times. today i am daunted by this task.

there are no other pressing matters in my life currently. the christmas shopping has been completed, names and ideas scratched off the list quickly as a raced through the mall along with all the stay at home mothers and homeless men seeking the warmth of the indoors. since my return to the wasteland i have spent all of my time sleeping, watching the greatest hip songs countdown, and reading, which has been a welcome respite from the weariness of six days on the road. i am stuck in anticipation of the next series of moves that i have yet to make. when the rain falls again, it will be a time to execute. this is the time for careful preparation. however, today is a cat's game.